Female First Media

When I was a senior in high school, I ran for Class President. A position I had held consistently since the eighth grade which, admittedly, could appear more like a dictatorship than a democracy. But it was a mostly thankless job nobody else wanted and I often ran unopposed. Until senior year, when my good friend Brian, asked me to run with him as “Co-Presidents”, a preposterous suggestion that may work for co-captains in school sports but had no place in the cutthroat world of public-school politics. When I politely declined his offer, he started an aggressive whisper campaign, talking shit about me and my ability to lead. “People have been talking.”, he’d say.  “People think Mary does too many extracurriculars to be an effective President.” I was an editor of the school newspaper and yearbook, Vice President of the concert band, drummer in the school’s marching and jazz bands, a lead in the school musical and a member of the Student Council and Latin Club. I anonymously published my own underground zine called “The Leachy Nut” and wrote award winning one-act plays that got me into college. Class President was the easy part. When I won the election handily and started calling Brian “Judas” to his face, I filed this encounter far away, but with an ominous feeling, thinking something like this might happen again one day.

When I was in my early thirties, I worked on a nationally syndicated talk show and started developing and pitching my own TV projects to production executives all over New York. A male colleague of mine, a friend since college, pulled me aside one day. “It seems like you’re always looking for the next job, like what you have is not enough.”, he said to me. I gently explained that we were working on the last season of a soon to be cancelled morning show, so it might be a good idea to look for future work. He seemed visibly disgusted by my having fresh creative ideas and even worse, ambitions.

And just a few weeks ago, I was filming a public event when an older gentleman approached me and started asking questions about my film equipment, asking if I had charged enough batteries and implying my set up might not be in the best spot for maximum coverage. I just looked at him blankly and when I blinked I saw Brian from high school and all the Brians from all the jobs and trips and meetings and dinners,  conferences and flights and conversations throughout my 52 years of living… Brians who felt comfortable enough, smart enough, skilled enough, qualified enough and man enough to question me, attempt to “correct” me, discourage me and actively collude against me. So why in the world would I co-found and launch a new media platform that centers the stories and lives of women? Why in the world would we make films, publish books, run a Newsletter and create incredible spaces and experiences by women, for women? Why in the world would we do all of that?

Because of the world. I’m just one person, with these experiences that echo many of my friends and colleagues through the years. It doesn’t derail us or destroy us, but it can chip away at you. It can sour an otherwise exciting time, harsh a career high, or compromise a meaningful moment. It can also fuel new places and frame a bigger view. How could it not? Gal Pal is a first for me. This is the first time I have built something so big from scratch. First time I have partnered with someone so complimentary to my skill set. First time I have truly put women’s lives, stories and voices first -  absolutely, unequivocally, and unapologetically. I highly recommend it. It feels great!

Gal Pal is not the first to put women first. Nor will we be the last. But we will be one of them. One of innovation and collaboration, one of intersectionality and progressive ideals. One of the places to be everything you are and everything you dream to be. It’s no secret,Gal Pal is a big swing and the hardest I have ever leaned into something in my life. Some days, I lean so hard I feel like I might just fall over but somehow, I never do. It’s as if there’s just enough of us to hold it all up. That’s the thing about firsts: you have to lean in to fly.

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Mary Matthews is a former five term class president, a filmmaker, illustrator, co-founder and chief creative officer at Gal Pal. Follow her work @galpalmedia.